So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
