dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
