She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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