question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
