Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
