I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize
