Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Let the clothes fall where they may.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize
