My sheets look like a crime scene.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
