I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
