I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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