I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
