her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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