Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Randomize
