i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
