Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize