You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
