never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
