is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
