Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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