The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
