I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Randomize
