i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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