He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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