That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Randomize
