where does the pee come out of this thing
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Randomize
