Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
