You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
