He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
