If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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