I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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