For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
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