I want to stick my p in your. b.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Randomize