So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
