hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
