Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
