I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
