I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
