Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
