It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
How does one acquire holy water?
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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