I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
