If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Randomize
