covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
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