and next time when you feel me up, do it right
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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