Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
