he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
