YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
