yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
you would pick up someone in the library
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
