I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize