You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize