so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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