I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Randomize