Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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