he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
